I’m a glass half full kind of person. I am always trying to see the positives in a bad situation, and if I could avoid conflict then I would. That being said, it can sometimes be difficult to see a positive to something that is as mentally invasive as emetophobia. Of course that hasn’t stopped me from trying which is why I’ve compiled a list of 10 reasons why emets are basically the best:
- Your food will always be the freshest, and the most delicious. Emets don’t mess around with food, and they want to make sure they are utilizing the freshest ingredients. The only complaint you might have is that it’s a little too done, but look – better safe than sorry, am I right?
- They are always carrying hand sanitizer and a mini drug store with them. Need a tissue? They’ve got that. Want to use some hand sanitizer before dinner? They have that too. Feeling a little under the weather? Here’s some medicine. They will never leave you hanging when you need medicine, but may not stick around long after aiding you. No offense of course.
- Their houses are almost always pretty clean. Floors will be spotless, all surfaces sanitized. You could probably eat off their floors, but we wouldn’t recommend it of course because that’s just gross.
- Escape plans are just part of their DNA. Emets are basically ninjas. They have the ability to escape any situation quickly and quietly, and magically appear somewhere else in a matter of seconds. It doesn’t matter where, they always know the best way to exit a room in case of an emergency which makes them perfect people to hang around.
- They have a super power. I don’t know how useful it can be sometimes, but emets have super hearing. They can hear things that normal people can’t. You know those people gossiping in the corner? Yup, they heard that. That dog whistle that you think only dogs can hear? Well, I’ve got news for you – they heard that too. But with great power comes great responsibility, which is why they usually only use it to keep themselves safe.
- They care too much. Some people might say that’s an issue, but I say it’s not. If you’re feeling bad, emets will always be there to ask if your okay. They want to make sure you’re feeling your best, and if that means checking up every 15 to 20 minutes they’ll do it.
- They are super healthy. Well, okay this might not be true for every emet, but the majority of them are. How often do you hear about an emet being sick? It’s rare. It doesn’t matter what kind of sickness, usually emets only see a couple sick days a year. I guess the old saying “A panic attack a day keeps the doctor away” has some legitimacy. Or maybe I just say that…
- They’ve got a great resting heart rate and stamina. And speaking of panic attacks, they are actually very useful. When your heart rate spikes it gives you the same effect as a great cardio workout. So not only does this mean they can do more for longer periods of time, but they are superhuman. Don’t believe me, see point #5 again.
- They have super strength. It might not be physical strength, but their mental and emotional strength is stellar. They’ve built up an immunity to distressing situations, meaning smaller struggles aren’t as hard to manage. They are able to handle the scariest situations with grace and ease, which makes them pillars of strength.
- They know what they want. Most emets have no problem telling people what they want and need. When they go out to dinner, they know exactly what they want. Not sure about what to do on the weekend? Well they know exactly what the best happenings are that will be best for everyone that poses the smallest threat.
So, I guess it’s pretty clear – emets really are the best people in the universe 🙂
Until next time, Internet!
If you would like to email me, you can send any questions, concerns, comments or suggestions to firstname.lastname@example.org. I will do my best to respond to you within 48 hours, but if for some reason I cannot get back to you in that time frame, I promise I will always respond as soon as possible. You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram!
Lastly, I run an Emetophobia Support Group on Facebook. Emetophobia is the intense and irrational fear of throwing up, and it is one struggle I am passionately engaged in. The group is a closed, by request only group to help facilitate sharing and support by all members. It is also private, meaning that the posts you and others make will not show up publicly in your newsfeed.