Dear Diary, I Am #Fearless
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Dear Diary: Thanksgiving, Anxiety & An Announcement

A lot has happened this past week, and by a lot I mean really just two things: Thanksgiving and our upcoming move to Idaho.

Thanksgiving has always been a rough holiday for me, but this year it was pleasant. One could say it was the best Thanksgiving I’d had in a while. My entire family was together, and we got along, which is awesome, and once dinner concluded my siblings and husband piled into a car to beat the mad rush of Thanksgiving shoppers at our local mall.

We colored and laughed, and it reminded me that even though my track record with this holiday may not be the best, it doesn’t mean they can’t be wonderful from time to time.

But, anxiety is a tough emotion because it doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t care that your family slaved in the kitchen cooking a meal all day for you, and it surely doesn’t care that you need to be doing things that are important (like work, caring for your pets or reading something for your sister).

In fact, it just does what it wants, and like all great things, it reared it’s ugly head on Thanksgiving, a reminder that no good deed goes unpunished – even if it’s irrational.

So, this meant that I managed to make Thanksgiving awkward by refusing to eat 90% of what was put in front of me because I had a mild anxiety attack before dinner. I eventually grazed my way through the night to eat to my fullest, but at the dinner table it looked like I was starving myself.

While I can’t say that it was perfect thanks to my silly brain, it was pretty darn close. I got a lot of great items from Black Friday Eve shopping, and had a two night slumber party with my sister in her bunk beds.

And before I go, I wanted to just make sure I mentioned a few more things around Idaho. In my last post I mentioned we were moving to Twin Falls because my husband took a job with Clif Bar.

His first day is Dec. 14, and he will be back in time to spend two weeks with family for Christmas before heading back to Idaho. I’ll be at the house for as long as it takes for us to either sell the house, or I go crazy living alone for the first time in my life.

As we begin the process of selling our home and uprooting our life, I cannot be more thankful for all the love and support we have received about this decision.

Deciding to move to Idaho was not easy, and knew that leaving our families behind was going to be a serious factor that contributed to us staying or going. Our immediate family gave their blessings, but we wanted to know our friends understood as well.

The outpouring of support has been tremendous, and we would like to thank every one of the people that have taken the time to message us, text us and call us to congratulate us on our new venture.

I can’t wait to chronicle our move and to let you in on how I’m balancing the anxiety of flying during norovirus season with the stress of a cross country trek. Just the thought is making me start to panic…

Anyways, I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving holiday, free of stress, anxiety and sickness.

Until next time, Internet!

If you would like to email me, you can send any questions, concerns, comments or suggestions to contact@hashtagfearless.com. I will do my best to respond to you within 48 hours, but if for some reason I cannot get back to you in that time frame, I promise I will always respond as soon as possible. You can also find me on  FacebookTwitterPinterest and Instagram

Lastly, I run an Emetophobia Support Group on Facebook. Emetophobia is the intense and irrational fear of throwing up, and it is one struggle I am passionately engaged in. The group is a closed, by request only group to help facilitate sharing and support by all members. It is also private, meaning that the posts you and others make will not show up publicly in your newsfeed.

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