This is the final part of a six part series called Finding #Fearless. It’s the story of my life, my journey and the struggles I’ve endured that have made me who I am today. All names and places have been changed to protect the people involved. To read the rest of the series, please click below:
If I had to choose an anthem to define the last half of 2016 that carries into 2017, it would be, without a doubt, Katy Perry’s Rise. The moment I heard it, I fell in love. It was one of those songs that I blared on my worst days, and sang myself almost hoarse to on many occasions. It’s the kind of song that makes you feel like the Holy Spirit is moving through you, revitalizing your very essence, and cleansing your soul of impurities.
Or… maybe that’s just me.
No matter how the song makes you feel, this song means something to me and that’s really all that matters.
Although I have been through a lot of not so great moments in my life, I think I could safely say that 2016 was my hardest year I’ve had in a really, really long time. Despite making a cross country move and adjusting to a new, stay-at-home kind of life, my mental health became a battle I hadn’t seen the likes of since high school.
Nothing can really prepare you for the mental, physical and emotional shock that comes from a complete 180 in your mental health, or physical health for that matter. That’s not to be dramatic, it’s just the truth, because that kind of change can really alter your reality and shake you to your core.
However, what defines that moment isn’t when everything changed, but when you decided that the battle wasn’t going to destroy you. It’s when you got the courage to stand up again, even when your mind was beating you down.
This is when I got my idea for #Fearless, and that mindset is the entire foundation of this new and improved me.
When I think of being fearless, it’s not proclaiming that I faced these adversities with no fear because trust me I was pretty freaking scared. Instead, I found a way to prevail and continue on despite that fear. It was finding a way to pull myself up when I felt paralyzed by panic, and realizing that this fear would strengthen me even if it didn’t feel that way in the moment. This blog, and my journey, isn’t to boast about only the positives anymore, but to examine the negatives and realize that they make you into something bigger and better.
No one’s life is perfect, but for some reason we have this obsession for making it seem like we have it all together. Having struggles doesn’t make us flawed, it makes us human. Perfection is impossible, so strive to be perfectly imperfect; strive to be perfectly you – whatever that means or consists of. Do not hide your colors for the sake of seeming perfect.
All my life I’ve had obstacles that tried to take me down, but I kept fighting, and like a phoenix, I rose from the ashes. I’m still a work in progress, I still have a lot to learn, but I haven’t given up and I won’t give up, no matter what. Most importantly, I’ve learned to accept myself, my entire self, and not let anyone else tell me how I should act or feel.
And still I rise.
If you would like to email me, you can send any questions, concerns, comments or suggestions to email@example.com. I will do my best to respond to you within 48 hours, but if for some reason I cannot get back to you in that time frame, I promise I will always respond as soon as possible. You can also find me on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram!
Lastly, I run an Emetophobia Support Group on Facebook. Emetophobia is the intense and irrational fear of throwing up, and it is one struggle I am passionately engaged in. The group is a closed, by request only group to help facilitate sharing and support by all members. It is also private, meaning that the posts you and others make will not show up publicly in your newsfeed.