All posts tagged: Love & Life

Why My Husband & I Have Chosen To Be Childless

Let’s just cut to the chase: my husband and I don’t plan on having kids. That could change, but right now, we’re choosing to stay childless (excluding furchildren) for the foreseeable future. There are a lot of factors that go into this decision, and I’ll get to those in a minute, but I want to spend the next paragraph or so delivering a very important message: Nothing you say will change our minds. Seriously. There is nothing you can say or do that will sway us to change our decision regarding children. We’ve had many, many discussions about this, and we’ve explored just about every single scenario out there. We, as a couple, always talked about having kids, but things change, and right now this is the best decision for us. And, while no one who makes this same decision owe an explanation, I’m going to lay out just a few of the reasons my husband and I have decided to stay childless: My Mental Health I’ve heard this so many times when I put …

#Fearless’s Simple Steps To Practicing Self-Care

Self-care is something I have written about thousands of time in the history of #Fearless, and it’s something that I will continue to write about for the rest of time because it’s so freaking important. Not just for people with mental health issues, but for every single human being on the planet. I don’t care if you’re 100% healthy, everyone gets stressed sometimes. Work, life and human responsibilities take a lot out of you. Dedicating 30 minutes, an hour, a day to focusing on what you know you need, versus your responsibilities, really can make a difference. In the past I’ve written about the importance of self-care but I’ve never really given you the key steps to finding what you need to be doing for self-care. I figured, in light of this, why not offer you my tips on how to find the best self-care routine for you! Step One: Assess the mental, physical and emotional state you’re currently in. Before proper self-care can be done, you have to be able to look inside yourself …

5 Things Millennials Need To Stop Feeling Bad About

I feel, as millennials, we get a lot of crap. Whether it’s headlines about what we’ve “killed” or for simply being “entitled” or “lazy”, we just can’t seem to get any positive praise from the generations before us. Yes, I’m looking at you, Baby Boomers. But, in the midst of all this chaos, it got me thinking how many times I’ve felt bad for simply making choices that seem to be bettering my mental, physical, emotional state because of said headline writers and Baby Boomers. The constant tug of war of doing what I know is right, versus doing things “the way it’s always been” has never been a bigger issue than it is now for millennials. And, to be honest, I’m downright tired of it, so here’s a list of 5 very important things that millennials (or really, anyone) need to stop apologizing for and feeling bad for, like, yesterday: Your relationship status. Listen here, fellow millennials. Just because your great, great, great Grandma Sally Mae was married at the age of 17 doesn’t …

7 Awesome Anxiety Reducing Items (& Alternatives!) To Keep At Your Desk!

If you’re like me, working a desk job and having anxiety are two inevitabilities of life. I get up, go to work, and sometimes my buddy anxiety is right there with me. Other times, they show up after a stressful day, or right before a deadline. Either way, I’ve just learned that life with anxiety is going to happen, so why not be prepared? This got me thinking about ways I can best equip my desk with items that will help me in the midst of anxiety. While not a comprehensive list, I’ve compiled a list of seven awesome anxiety reducing items to keep at your desk, for your reading pleasure. Essential Oil Defuser: I feel like as an anxiety sufferer, essential oils are just part of my calm down process. I use Eucalyptus and Mint, together usually, to help me relax and get to my “calm place”. This “calm place” is a meditation I do to help me get grounded again during a panic attack, and that meditation is attached to those scents. So, having …

Gender vs. Sex: A #Fearless Perspective

Over the last few months I’ve been doing a lot of talking about the difference between a person’s sex and a person’s gender. Primarily to people on Facebook, which is a terrible mistake if I’m being honest. My talking to people about this was in part to the recent announcement by the POTUS that he is going to ban transgender military personnel from serving or enlisting to serve. So, as you can imagine, trying to educate in the midst of a heated debate usually ends badly for someone who shares an unpopular opinion on a thread. But, if there’s any good that came from this, it’s that the topic on the difference between sex and gender is widely ignored. Many people don’t know that there is a difference between gender and sex, and they especially don’t know how they play very different parts into a persons life based. I contemplated whether or not talking about this was smart, but I decided oh what the heck? Why not use this platform to discuss the differences between …

Can You (& I) Be Addicted To Chaos?

“I feel like something is missing from my life, maybe it’s time for a change…” This is a VERY common phrase my husband is tired of hearing. I’ll bet, as I wrote that sentence, he compulsively put his head in his hands and doesn’t know why. In fact, it’s a phrase that’s probably more common than my wailing of “Ugh, I’m soooo boooorrreeeddd” or “Whats for *insert meal time here*?” No, that was a joke, there’s not much I say more than those two, I promise you that. But in a conversation the other day, I told my husband I don’t get why I keep feeling like this. Life is going pretty well for me right now. I have a good, steady job; I’m in the process of creating a from home bakery; I have a fairly decent social life; so whats the deal? Why am I feeling like I need to shake it up? The first thing I always go to is my job. Maybe it’s my job that needs changing, but it’s not …

#Fearless Family: My Partners Perspective of My Journey

By Amy C. #Fearless Family Writer I don’t know about other emotional abuse survivors, but I often look at my current romantic partner – my husband to be, no less – and think, “How can you put up with me? Why do you stay with me, even when I have my wobbles? Hasn’t it been an awful chore?! Why do you stay and put yourself through that?!” It’s a scar left by living with someone who made it clear they found me tedious, boring, and stupid, and still influences my thought patterns to this day. The difference now is that I don’t let it take me down. I recognise them and do something about them, so you know what I did about these questions? I asked them. I’m not at home to repressing and hiding my questions, imagining the worst, and living with crippling doubt and self-loathing anymore. If I want to know what my love really thinks, I ask him, safe and confident in the knowledge that he will answer honestly and respectfully…and often …

#Fearless Quote of the Week: July 3-July 9

This week’s quote was chosen by Chelsie S., writer for (and owner of) #Fearless. See what it is and why she chose it below: “This week is a very special week for me, so this quote is a bit more personal than it usually is. In just 4 days, I’ll have been with my husband, partner in crime and best friend for 10 years total. We started dating July 7, 2007, and it’s been the best 10 years of my life – so far. This quote, when I saw it, rang so true to me because when we started dating it was the first time in a very long time I felt truly comfortable and safe being myself. Now, at almost 10 years, this quote is even more true than it was back then. He has helped me discover myself, after a lifetime of being who I thought the world wanted me to be. He’s been by my side the entire journey, and I have nothing but gratitude and love to give him in return. …

Dear Thomas Sanders: Thank You.

Dear Thomas Sanders, I’m not sure if you’ll ever see this letter, but I sure hope one day you do. I’ve been trying to decide the best way to approach this, and it’s been a tough one. Do I talk about how much I love your videos (especially the Story Time and Disney Pranks)? Do I mention that your YouTube videos are some of the greatest content I’ve seen in a long time? It’d be easy to spend this letter fangirling about the amazing content you make, but I think for me this letter is much more than that. To make it simple, this letter is to say thank you. Thank you for all that you do, and I hope you realize just how much of an impact you have on people. I have never once felt out of place when watching your videos, or interacting with the fans you have. You’re so inclusive, right down to your pretty amazing “Guys, gals and nonbinary pals!” catch phrase. Could you call that a catchphrase? Well, I’m …

Why I Decided To Come Out

I just spent about two hours trying to craft the perfectly written article for all the reasons why I decided to come out, what factors went in to deciding if I should, and all that jazz. I sat down to read what I wrote and immediately said I didn’t like it. I scrapped it all, and what you’re reading now is what I think is more important. You want to know why I came out? Because I wanted to. It’s really that simple, and all the long winded babbling for a more in depth reason seems unnecessary. I came out because I wanted to accept myself and be proud of who I was. That should be the end of the discussion, but that’d make for a pretty lame post, wouldn’t it? When I sat down to publish my Finding #Fearless article on pansexuality, I was nervous; nervous for a lot of reasons. There was the what if of what my friends and family would say (would they even care? had they always known?). Then there …