All posts tagged: Mental Illness

#Fearless Family: Why I Stayed

By CMT #Fearless Family Writer I had a good portion of this written, and then I erased it all. After a period of dwelling and analyzing, I realized that I was writing down every horrible thing he did to me and found myself explaining my actions to possible readers. I was writing out of anger and I wanted to drudge up a “She-woman Man Hater” club. I wanted strangers to hate him. I was writing from a place of anger and re-living every negative detail made it feel like it was happening all over again. I’ve spent two years trying to heal and forgive him and I was slowly undoing my progress. “Why did you stay? I tried to tell you, but you wouldn’t listen. Well, if it was me, I would have left before it started.” Whenever I try to talk about my experience about being in an abusive relationship, those are the words that I hear the most. No one likes to be abused and no one stays for fun. I can’t speak …

#Fearless’s Simple Steps To Practicing Self-Care

Self-care is something I have written about thousands of time in the history of #Fearless, and it’s something that I will continue to write about for the rest of time because it’s so freaking important. Not just for people with mental health issues, but for every single human being on the planet. I don’t care if you’re 100% healthy, everyone gets stressed sometimes. Work, life and human responsibilities take a lot out of you. Dedicating 30 minutes, an hour, a day to focusing on what you know you need, versus your responsibilities, really can make a difference. In the past I’ve written about the importance of self-care but I’ve never really given you the key steps to finding what you need to be doing for self-care. I figured, in light of this, why not offer you my tips on how to find the best self-care routine for you! Step One: Assess the mental, physical and emotional state you’re currently in. Before proper self-care can be done, you have to be able to look inside yourself …

5 Things Millennials Need To Stop Feeling Bad About

I feel, as millennials, we get a lot of crap. Whether it’s headlines about what we’ve “killed” or for simply being “entitled” or “lazy”, we just can’t seem to get any positive praise from the generations before us. Yes, I’m looking at you, Baby Boomers. But, in the midst of all this chaos, it got me thinking how many times I’ve felt bad for simply making choices that seem to be bettering my mental, physical, emotional state because of said headline writers and Baby Boomers. The constant tug of war of doing what I know is right, versus doing things “the way it’s always been” has never been a bigger issue than it is now for millennials. And, to be honest, I’m downright tired of it, so here’s a list of 5 very important things that millennials (or really, anyone) need to stop apologizing for and feeling bad for, like, yesterday: Your relationship status. Listen here, fellow millennials. Just because your great, great, great Grandma Sally Mae was married at the age of 17 doesn’t …

#Fearless Family: Navigating Alcoholism’s Aftermath

By Alexa M. #Fearless Family Writer I am 26 years old, and a full blown millennial. I shared my wedding pictures on Facebook the day I got them, my snapchat is approximately 99% my dog and 1% my anxiety attacks, and I wanted Bernie Sanders to win the election. Part of the territory of being my age (and any age after me, really) is having friends discuss their longing to return back to the “good ol’ days”. You know, the days when their biggest worry was finishing their math homework, or whether that birthday invite was coming in the mail. Not working 40 hours a week or trying to pay the bills on time. After all, “adulting” is hard. But I can’t identify with that. Despite my mortgage, car insurance and student loan payments, I would never wish to go back to my childhood. You see, I’m an adult child of alcoholics. Both of my parents are alcoholic/addicts, and even though they are in recovery now, the events of my childhood still affect me to …

7 Awesome Anxiety Reducing Items (& Alternatives!) To Keep At Your Desk!

If you’re like me, working a desk job and having anxiety are two inevitabilities of life. I get up, go to work, and sometimes my buddy anxiety is right there with me. Other times, they show up after a stressful day, or right before a deadline. Either way, I’ve just learned that life with anxiety is going to happen, so why not be prepared? This got me thinking about ways I can best equip my desk with items that will help me in the midst of anxiety. While not a comprehensive list, I’ve compiled a list of seven awesome anxiety reducing items to keep at your desk, for your reading pleasure. Essential Oil Defuser: I feel like as an anxiety sufferer, essential oils are just part of my calm down process. I use Eucalyptus and Mint, together usually, to help me relax and get to my “calm place”. This “calm place” is a meditation I do to help me get grounded again during a panic attack, and that meditation is attached to those scents. So, having …

#Fearless Family: An Open Letter To My Abuser – I Forgive You

By No Longer A Victim #Fearless Family Writer To My Abuser: When you first came into my life, I had no idea you would be one of my worst nightmares. I looked up to you as a father figure, a friend. Little did I know it was all a disguise to get what you really wanted…me. You not only took my innocence, my happiness, and those 2 years of my life, but you also took away future years of confidence, countless nights of wonderful dreams, trust in others (including the man who is now my husband), and feelings of safety. Over 10 years later, and I still have nights where I relive what you did to me in my dreams. It took me years to learn to not cringe or shy away when my husband gets close to me. I now live in a state of anxiety of people who get too close to my daughter, terrified that the same thing might happen to her. She’s only 5, and yet I’ve already begun teaching her …

#Fearless Family: My Partners Perspective of My Journey

By Amy C. #Fearless Family Writer I don’t know about other emotional abuse survivors, but I often look at my current romantic partner – my husband to be, no less – and think, “How can you put up with me? Why do you stay with me, even when I have my wobbles? Hasn’t it been an awful chore?! Why do you stay and put yourself through that?!” It’s a scar left by living with someone who made it clear they found me tedious, boring, and stupid, and still influences my thought patterns to this day. The difference now is that I don’t let it take me down. I recognise them and do something about them, so you know what I did about these questions? I asked them. I’m not at home to repressing and hiding my questions, imagining the worst, and living with crippling doubt and self-loathing anymore. If I want to know what my love really thinks, I ask him, safe and confident in the knowledge that he will answer honestly and respectfully…and often …

#Fearless Family: When You Think You Know Best For Someone With Mental Illness

By Face to Face With The Sky #Fearless Family Writer I like to think of myself as a compassionate person. The type who puts myself in other people’s shoes. I’m there for my friends, and when needed I’m a shoulder to cry on. But sometimes, I’m not the sweet, compassionate person I think I am. Last year, my close friend was diagnosed with a mental health condition. We’re in touch almost constantly, sharing feelings and swapping ideas. As someone who has also been through my share of mental illness, I find it easy to have compassion for her. Until she makes a choice I don’t agree with. When that happens, I feel my blood boiling. Gone is the compassionate understanding friend. Instead I’m angry. How could she do such a thing? Doesn’t she see she’s only making her recovery harder? Once I lashed out and gave her a lecture about what she “should” do instead. How do you think that went over? You guessed it: she felt alienated and I felt like was talking to …

Thank You For A Successful MHAM Fundraiser!

I’m so very excited to be writing this post, because #Fearless’s Mental Health Awareness Month Fundraiser was a huge success. For those who did not know, from May 1 to May 31, #Fearless ran two fundraisers: one being a t-shirt sale, and the other being a local baking fundraiser. These two together made up a huge effort to raise as much money as possible for The Trevor Project, and organization that helps with crisis intervention and suicide prevention in LGBTQ+ teens. In total, we raised $445 for The Trevor Project, which doubled the amount of money that was made last year ($220). Not only was I completely floored at how well this did, it just proves that this world isn’t as bad as it sometimes seems. It’s my hope that next year, no matter what the vessel of fundraising is, that we can hit $500 for another great organization! I love to raise awareness and funds for organizations whenever I can. If I could, I’d donate almost all my money to charity, but I just …

Let’s Do Away With The Phrase “Normal People”

It should come as no shock to any of you that I’m a huge mental health advocate. I work very hard to promote the normality of mental health, and lifting those up who feel like they are less than or broken because of those struggles. I run a support group on Facebook for emetophobia, and every day I interact with people who feel like their phobia makes them worthless, disgusting and undeserving (but, spoiler alert: it doesn’t!). However, it hit me while I was commenting on a post recently how, despite my best efforts to normalize mental health, I too have fallen victim to making myself (and likely others) still feel less than. I do this by referring to non-emets (and non-anxiety sufferers) as “normal people” and I think it’s time we changed that. Because, really, what the hell is normal anyways? I once had an abnormal psych professor in college who challenged us to figure out what “normal” was. He told us normal is a lie (of course I’m sure he said it a …