Sometimes, there are quotes, phrases or situations that don’t show their true meaning until the right moment presents itself. I’m a frequent flyer of the inspirational quotes on Pinterest, and while I have hundreds of quotes compiled on a board appropriately titled Inspirational Quotes<3, there are just some weeks those quotes are simply words. I know, in my heart, they should be inspirational, but they just don’t resonate with me. Whether that’s because they aren’t the words I need to hear or it’s simply something I’ll never understand, when you get right down to it, an inspirational quote only has meaning if it makes you feel something.
Have you ever just felt like the only appropriate way to express how you feel is to just bang your head over the keyboard and see the random string of letters, symbols and numbers pop up? Sometimes, despite my ability to speak freely and openly, I am truly at a loss for words. This is one of those times. I have literally written and deleted three or four drafts of this post, all of which have probably been more than the perfect way to depict what I was trying to say. However, it still just sounded like this in my mind: a;kshag09t23ptuq03[9toiakjgh;fs.
I feel like I need to preface this with saying you, the Internet, are very lucky. I have only ever told this to two other people: my therapist and my husband. They both happened on the same day, and that day was roughly 3.5 years ago. One of the biggest struggles I faced with emetophobia was not just the phobia itself, but trying to learn to tools and coping mechanisms to handle the anxiety and panic that was associated with it. Cognitive Behaviorial Therapy (CBT) is by far the best thing my therapist did with me, and a lot if it is simple coping techniques to help me stretch my boundaries.